#GraduateStory | Ashley Shen: What I Truly Found Were the Questions Without Answers

Part 01

How My Curiosity Began

My first encounter with biology was probably in Grade 1. My parents limited television, and I had no phone to scroll through, so the books on our shelves were my main source of entertainment. Most had been bought for my parents themselves. On dull weekends, I stared at titles I could barely understand. The pictures were easier to follow, and one day I opened a book with a mammoth on its cover.

At first, I was interested only in the vivid illustrations of prehistoric animals. I went through the book from beginning to end, examining creatures very different from those I had imagined. Eventually, after exhausting the pictures, I began reading short passages to find out what the book was about. Little by little, I finished it. Reading that book became one of my earliest memories of learning about biology.

As I grew older, my parents allowed me to watch television, and Animal World became my favorite program. The wonder that book had inspired was part of the reason. Nature channels also seemed to have fewer advertisements than children's channels, leaving me more time to watch animals.

In middle school, I began studying biology systematically. Even the complicated facts to memorize and the repeated exams were enjoyable to me, and my interest continued to grow. I began to feel that biology might suit me, though my eventual decision to major in it came later.

Part 02

Understanding Life Through Research

When I entered Beijing Academy, my interest in biology led me to join the iGEM team in Grade 10. As a member of the dry lab team, I began my first serious exploration of the subject. Soon afterward, I also joined a research project on targeted treatment for neonatal colitis. I brought the same curiosity I had felt while looking through illustrated books and watching Animal World, expecting research to be a more sophisticated way of collecting knowledge. Once I began, I encountered a vast body of literature and experiments that repeatedly failed, along with models we were still revising late at night. I came to appreciate biology's fascination with questions: however much we think we understand, there is always more to learn.

That project gave me my first close encounter with life's fragility and resilience. Under the microscope, intestinal sections from newborn mice revealed intricate structures; even a change in an individual cell could set off inflammation. As I read research data about newborn babies suffering from colitis, my childhood fascination with mammoth illustrations and my later absorption in televised wildebeest migrations acquired a purpose. I wanted to understand life and take an active part in protecting it.

At that moment, biology became a responsibility I wanted to take seriously. The pictures in books and animals on television had brought me to a subject through which I could help others. I wanted to use what I had learned to investigate unanswered questions, even if my contribution extended our knowledge only a little.



Part 03

Exploring My Other Interests

Choosing a major early can help students plan activities and develop an application that reflects their intended field. I also believe we should give ourselves room to explore other interests. Doing so was an essential part of my high school years at Beijing Academy.

My friends know that I spent years writing horror fiction. In Grade 11, I founded a writing club and collaborated with the Neuroscience Club to create a murder mystery role-playing game. My first research topic during the Experiential Course explored growing interest in Buddhism, a subject in religious studies. Alongside my demanding Grade 11 coursework, I also assembled a portfolio of my ceramics.

These varied pursuits each expressed another part of who I was. Together, they helped me develop a fuller sense of myself and gave my application greater depth.



Part 04

Persistence and Making Peace with My Choices

At a recent school open day, a parent asked us volunteers, "If you could return to Grade 10 and start again, would your admissions results be different?" I thought carefully about the question. I had regrets about application season, and I would probably make the same choices again. Asked to describe myself, I would certainly include the word stubborn.

Once I decide to do something, I am determined to see it through. In Grade 10, I entered the John Locke Essay Competition with a theology essay I had written out of interest, with little preparation. Unsurprisingly, it received no recognition. That small attempt prompted a year of reflection. During the busiest part of Grade 11, I entered again, balancing the competition with intensive preparation for standardized exams and the approaching application season. This time, I received a Commendation. By then, I recognized my own determination. When choosing universities, I remained committed to the dream university I wanted most, despite how distant it seemed. People around me advised me to reconsider, and I sometimes hesitated. Ultimately, I kept my original choice. I had prepared sufficient backup options before adopting what looked like an ambitious application strategy, and I felt confident in my decision.

That determination also brought painful self-doubt and a long period of waiting.

I still believe that life holds many possibilities I have yet to discover.

Learning to make peace with application season has been an important part of the process. Returning to the question at the beginning of this section, I would make the same choices again. I understand the tradeoffs, and I also know that some decisions must be experienced firsthand before I can feel at peace with myself. Applications are now over, and I have a long life ahead to look forward to. Finding a balance between determination and acceptance will help me keep going.



Part 05

What Three Years Have Given Me

Looking back at myself in Grade 10, I realize that my three years at Beijing Academy brought the greatest changes of my life so far. I found friends who encouraged me, and whom I encouraged in return. I grew comfortable speaking up after years of preferring to listen. I also learned to coordinate a team's work after initially being content to contribute my own part. The opportunities and challenges of these years helped me become the person I am today.

I remember our MFP project especially clearly. The experiments involved complicated procedures and repetitive work. We spent almost all our free time in the laboratory and still felt short of time. We asked our teacher whether we could work there independently during study periods, expecting a refusal. To our surprise, the teacher readily agreed and gave us access to all the equipment. The trust and understanding of Beijing Academy's teachers gave us the confidence to continue.

I still remember taking moldy oranges from our classroom to the laboratory to prepare sections for observation. I remember the lawn at the Jinzhang Campus in the warm afternoon sun, and the slightly chilly evenings spent on the swings. Perhaps these ordinary moments are what I value most about those three years. They would be difficult to include in an application essay or offer as evidence of an achievement, and their influence on me runs deeper than any award.

Finally, I thank my mother and father for their wholehearted support and understanding during application season. You allowed me to concentrate fully on the process.

I thank my biology teacher, Dai Ying, and my Chinese Literature teacher, Hu Yunge, along with my Homeroom Teacher, Tan Ling, and College Counselor, Zheng Shanshan, for writing my recommendation letters. I am also grateful to every Beijing Academy teacher who taught me during high school. Your guidance and support helped me become who I am today.

I also thank my friends at Beijing Academy for accompanying me throughout these years. Your friendship gave me a sense of belonging as I grew up.